Accident prone? Me?

Of course I am. I’m a disaster in the making. I have bruises on my scars. Even my owies have owies. I have yet to persuade TLC that a cleaver for the kitchen is actually a really good idea and much safer to use than the average kitchen knife. “Rob,” she patiently reminds me, “I was there when you took off the top of your thumb with a vegetable peeler. I think I can imagine what’ll happen as soon as you get your mitts on something with serious cutting potential.” Honestly. Given a chance, she’d have me choppping veg with a spoon.
I have my moments, but even I am a paragon of safety compared to James Nicholl, whose postings on rec.arts.sf are reproduced here.
I have to agree with his views on the usage of straight razors, too.

(from Sore Eyes.)