It feels like everywhere you turn, service providers are jamming AI into your crevices and expecting you to be happy about it. Grammarly were caught in shenanigans this week with the whole author mimicry clusterfukc — a move which led me to finally delete the preachy, unadventurous spell-checking app off my writing vectors.
Meanwhile WordPress.com has introduced machine learning into their hosted services—somewhat annoying as that’s how I get Excuses And Half Truths out to you every week. I’m happy to report that the agentic side is switched off by default. For me, and more crucially for you, that’s how it’ll stay. Anything you read here is handcrafted, the product of one slightly skew-whiff human mind. It may be a bit awkward, subject to weird swerves in tone and mood, but I like to think—to hope—the material herein is reflective of the fella what wrote it.
For honesty’s sake, I admit to poking around with some AI requests out of idle curiosity. I don’t want to come across as a knee-jerk reactionary who won’t use a car when a horse is available. Every single time I’ve pointed a task at ChatGPT or Gemini, the result has needed extensive rewrites and fact checks. Machine learning continues to add time and effort to my work. Why on earth would I embrace that?
Wherever you are, whenever you are, however you are, welcome to The Swipe.
Rob is reading…
Talking of snake oil, Anthony Warner’s The Angry Chef is a brutal, hilarious and sometimes rage-inducing take-down of the food influencers who claim you can be happier, healthier and thinner if you just buy their book and eat according to their rules. I’ve often been wary of the detox crew, but Warner is thorough, science-forward and unaccepting of woo and bullshit. A pretty essential read, I think.
Rob is watching…
Enshittification hits the mainstream with this excellent Norwegian public information film. Use ad-blockers and reading mode when available, folks. It’ll make your world so much calmer.
Rob is listening…
Did you know Stevie Nicks wanted to join Tom Petty And The Heartbreakers? Me neither. Armed with this knowledge you can totally see the creative intent behind this classic, fired out with admirable intensity by Shearwater and Sharon Van Etten. A path sadly untaken.
Rob is eating…
Haddock with lentils. OK, bear with me a sec, it’s story time.
I was vegetarian for about ten years in the 90s, a time when meal options were limited to Quorn or Linda McCartney (look, I was young and still finding my feet as a cook, OK?) I was even more profoundly egg-averse than I am now, so a trip to France might not have been a good idea. After a week of survival on bread and cheese, I finally cracked. On our last night we visited a fish restaurant in Le Havre and I had cod with lentils. It blew my head off. The flavour, the texture, mon dieu. I became a vegequerian that day, the first step on a path that leads me to now order my rib-eye medium rare at Miller And Carter.
Anyway. I cook fish with lentils often, most times adding a pesto crumb for extra crunch. Always a nostalgia trip, always utterly delicious.
Rob’s Low-Key Obsession Of The Week…
*starts eyeing up some of the dog-eared volumes on the bookshelf which could use a glow up*
C has invoked a strict ‘one in, one out’ policy on kitchen gadgets. This is annoyingly fair, as I would otherwise fill the place to bursting with trinkets and geegaws. Yes, yes, I know, all any good chef needs is a solid pan, a good knife and a hard-wearing spatula. But come on, where’s the fun in that?
you never know when you’re going to need to make five cheesecakes of varying sizes all at once
As The Big Birthday starts sneaking up on me, I am beginning to feel like a sartorial reinvention is at hand. Yes, Readership, it may finally be time for yer boy to Take The Scarf.
Two new episodes of a classic Doctor Who story landing in time for Easter? What a treat! The charitable trust Film Is Fabulous are doing brilliant work. It is very pleasing for an old film wonk like me to see magic coming out of basements and attics in a way only that format is able to do. Put it like this—if those episodes were on tape, the restoration work required would be significantly more difficult.
A good long read on the life and times of Thomas Dolby. A synth-pop pioneer, a restlessly inventive soul and, I’m delighted to see, a very cool dad.
Still Hyperactive After All These Years
I do not gamble. I don’t see the point, the attraction or any possible reason for it. But then McKay Coppins felt the same way, and just read what happened to him.
My laptop is 14 years old, on its second hard drive and brays like a mule when I try to get it to do anything other than write an email. I may be in the market for a new device, and the MacBook Neo is at the right level for me. I know my needs, and they are simple.
This Is Not The Computer For You
A New York Times rundown of the 20 Greatest Food Moments In Film has some shocking omissions alongside all the usual suspects. No Babette’s Feast? Or The Menu? Allow me to suggest the breakfast scene from Twister, which is a gracefully elegant way to show the family spirit at the heart of a dysfunctional bunch of tornadoes chasers. That gravy does look delicious, by the way.
Mason Currey’s bit on writing while socially anxious hit particularly hard for me. I regularly have to turn away from the outside world, needing peace, quiet and control. I’ve learned to accept it and not to force any other outcome. Honestly, I’m happy with who I am. This article does turn into a bit of a sales pitch at the end, fair warning.
Following the whole furore over Little Timmy Chalamet dunking on opera and ballet, here’s a take which makes a whole lot of sense. Ultimately, the arts need to be accessible. As it stands, it’s hard to see opera and ballet live (which is how they should be experienced) without laying down a ton of cash and heading to a major city. There’s little grass-roots initiatives for dance and music that challenges or stimulates in the way these great disciplines can.
Finally, this extraordinary story of a patient/therapist relationship gone wrong just gets worse and worse with every paragraph. No-one involved comes out looking good. A narcissistic triangle that I’m certain will be a Netflix series this time next year.
We Outro with more on the ongoing Michael Shannon/Jason Narducy REM cover project. They’re currently touring Lifes Rich Pageant. At a recent show, this happened. I think if I’d been in the audience I would have fainted.
See you in seven, fellow travellers.
EXCUSES AND HALF TRUTHS 