I ascribe to no religion, have no faith other than the sure and certain belief in the essential goodness of humanity—yes, even in the face of all evidence to the contrary. However, I’ll embrace a religious holiday like Easter with cheer and jollity. No honking about the separation of church and state in these quarters. As long as I’m not expected to actually attend a mass then hey, screw it, four days off is good for me.
There’s precedent for building your own celebration. You don’t have to stick to the state-approved baseline. Most of the western world’s modern religious festivals are closely tied to pagan calendar markers for the change in season, pre-Christian celebrations of rebirth and fertility, pledging fealty to the goddess Eostre. Go nuts with the symbolism. Praise the egg-laying bunnies of yore. Cook how you want, eat how you choose, be with the people you love. Or spend some quiet time alone if you’d rather, welcoming the new season with a smile.
Wherever you are, whenever you are, however you celebrate, welcome to The Swipe.
Rob is reading…
The Man With The Golden Gun by Ian Fleming. A very different prospect to the Roger Moore-starring film version. No elegant, evil Christopher Lee. No tiny servant. No giant laser on a secret island. The novel is a dark, sweaty, slab of pulp. Scaramanga is a psychopathic thug plotting an overthrow of Jamaica, Bond a traumatised ghost given one last chance to prove his loyalty after being brainwashed into an attempt to assassinate M. It’s all a bit bleak, frankly, feeling closer to Len Deighton than the glamour and fluff of the 007 universe. Which makes the whole experience all the more astringent and bracing. Well worth a go.
Rob is watching…
Hopefully you came out of the other side of the annual April Foolathon with your dignity intact. It’s all a bit corporate and obvious these days, as every brand scrambles for likes and views with increasingly ludicrous fictional product launches.
Which makes this lovely bit of silliness even sweeter. Graham Norton puts on an Adele impersonator showdown with a very special ringer. The response when everyone realises who Jenny is — just adorable. I got a glow off this, hope you do too.
Rob is listening…
To new WROB! The second round of our US/UK Shootout. I take the side of the colonies, While Jillian raises the Union Jack. Shenanigans, inevitably, ensue. I’ve also included the full Spotify mix of our choices should you choose for a voice-free experience.
Rob is eating…
Looking forward to getting the kamado fired up for the first cook of the season. Starting with something simple, just some grilled meats and veggies, but I have big plans this summer. Smoking and baking, fish fries, anything I can cook over a flame. Yes, yes, man cook with fire, ugh. But I’ll make the salad and do the washing-up as well. This isn’t the 80s, you know.
Rob’s Low-Key Obsession Of The Week…
I apologise for the hole this will carve into your Easter weekend. Honestly, it may better for you not to click on the link if you have plans.
I’m delighted to see Artemis making the long run out to lunar orbit, humanity breaking the bounds of Earth’s cloudy mantle for the first time in over 50 years. Life in space is the dream, of course. But unfortunately, as no less a dreamer than author of the Mars trilogy Kim Stanley Robinson tells us, reality has a nasty way of literally bringing us back to Earth with a bump…
Oh spell-checker, how I love and loathe thee. It’s a lifesaver and a heartbreaker all at once. The auto-correct built into iOS is particularly aggressive, and unwanted worms often steak into my praise. Alas*, typos have been stones on the rocky road the writer treads since the written word became a thing. Accept, correct, move on.
*autocorrect suggested Alan’s for alas. Do you see what I have to deal with?
Yes, of course everyone should pay their fair share of taxes. If you can afford to avoid doing so and embrace that swerve around perfectly reasonable financial contribution, then don’t be surprised when people think you’re a monster. It’s really easy to get angry about all this, so it’s nice to read about the guy who started Craigslist actually taking the right position. Bezos, Musk, pay attention.
It’s almost a cliche now to state we live in Orwellian times. Like, duh. But there’s still nuance in the argument, as film-maker Raoul Peck explores in his new documentary 2+2=5. Once you achieve clarity over what the press has become (or indeed, whether it has ever told the truth in the first place) your worldview snaps into focus. Orwell spotted this decades ago. It’s time we caught up.
A cracking bit of work on female characters in SF, how their opinions and ideas are ignored, gaslighted or actively stolen by men and oh right I get it now.
I have applied for inclusion into the second edition of The Internet Phone Book, a print-only guide to the best of the electronic world. It’s a great idea, beautifully put together. I think of the concept like a cookbook. Sure, you can get all the recipes you need from a quick Googly search. But sometimes it’s best just to pull out a favourite volume from the collection and have a browse. You might not find what you want, but you may end up where you were supposed to be.
Well, it’s been a good run, but according to the only slightly satirical service replacebyclawd, I’m not that far from being subsumed into an AI version of myself. The link below leads to my summary. Let’s just say I feel seen.
Here’s Alice Slater for Vittles on her perfect martini. It’s the long weekend, perhaps we should all indulge a bit. After reading the AI report above, I certainly feel like a drink.
Surgically clean, delightfully dirty.
Last up, a great long read from Kieran Morris as he follows acclaimed chef Endo Kazutoshi around Japan, following some very, very bad news. This is perfectly paced, heartbreaking but somehow hopeful.
In conclusion…
There are beautiful rumours of new music from Tom Waits, following the announcement of a new cover version compilation, out in May. I can but hope. While I enter a holding pattern, let’s have a blast from 2011, when he performed three songs as part of his induction into the Rock And Roll Hall Of Fame. He’s one of the true originals, and a big hero of mine. Can’t believe I’ve never seen this before.
See you in seven, fellow travellers.
EXCUSES AND HALF TRUTHS 