The DocoPhone starts ringing. It’s an old red Trimfone, thick with stickers, and the ringtone’s been modded to play a chip tune version of the Beastie Boy’s Sabotage.
It would be more than my life’s worth to ignore it, and my very soul would be forfeit if I let it bounce to voicemail or -gods forbid- redirect to the mobile. The DocoPhone is head of my to-do list every day.
“I have a job for you.” DocoBanksy’s voice is dry over the phone line, all inflection stripped away by the anonymising software he uses. In person he’s much warmer–much more human. But now he’s all business, and I’m all attention.
“A drop-off,” he continues. “Some friends of mine are shooting in your manor, and I need you to get them some stickers. Don’t make a meal of it. Be a pro. Someone will contact you. I’ve given them your number and private email. I told them you wouldn’t mind.”
Click. The line goes dead. I have my instructions. All I can do now is wait.
The call comes through soon after. Once you get involved with docoBanksy, you learn things move quickly. A charming chap called Mike, who’s happy to chat. We arrange a meet. A public place. The Delphi Bridge in the middle of Reading’s restaurant district. Plenty of witnesses if the deal goes south.
It’s dark when the drop happens, and Mike and I end up circling each other for a while before we make contact. He’s brought an oppo, a tasty cove called Sam and I regret not scaring up some back-up. But the deal goes smoothly, and my envelope stuffed with stickers vanishes into an inside pocket. “We’ll be in touch,” Sam says, and they melt back into the sodium-lit night. Ahead of them was a day with free-runner Hamza Shabazz, who would show them how he runs Reading.
And now there’s a film of their exploits. If you’re a Readingite, keep your eyes open for the stickers that Hamza planted – there’s more out there than you’ll see below. DocoBanksy declares himself pleased with the end product. As he should be.
Meanwhile, Sam and Mike of Getting Dirty would like you to know that they do this all day every day, and that you can find out more about them at their website. I think that’s a click that’s worth making.
EXCUSES AND HALF TRUTHS 